Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Fair weather fans versus REAL fans

Fair Weather fans versus REAL fans

As an entrepreneur, I believe you need fans, people who will root for you, believe in your ideas, believe in the greatness of your idea, always there to listen, understand and positively critique your ideas. These are REAL fans, people who are there for you in the good times and the bad.

Contrast this with fair weather fans. Fair weather fans are basically the people-version of fool's gold. A fair weather fan supports you in the moment, yet the second they are angry, they “stop” supporting you. Real life, real mature people don't work like this. You can't live your life in a rational way if you can't rely on the support and alleged foundation beneath you.  If the foundation crumbles and falls away every single time you actually need it, then it's not really a foundation at all.  This is one reason why relying on people, as a rule, is not a very intelligent way to live life. 

A fair weather fan reveals him or herself as a fair weather fan – instead of a REAL fan – in moments of emotion. You miss a shot or fumble the ball, and they start shouting obscenities, shouting for you to get off the field. They jeer your and mock you when you lose. They sing your praises when you win, and call for your downfall when you fail.

It is difficult to tell the difference between fair weather fans and REAL fans, because fair weather fans are great actors. They can fake the sincerity and legitimacy of a REAL fan, but their true colors are typically revealed, in the cavalier and flippant way they treat you when it suits them, and in the heat and nastiness of their words when they are angry.  True support and real fans do not behave like this.  When you discover that you are dealing with fake fans - and not receiving the real support you deserve - take advantage of every opportunity to reach out and find real support.  The difference - in its emotional affect on you - is profound.  It can be something as simple as finding an intellectual equal who can understand you, or just a warm and friendly person to fill the void that the phony fan left.

The ultimate key is to feel absolutely no shame or remorse when you are finally in a position to turn the tables and eradicate/free yourself from the negative voices and unsupportive characters in your life.  Your fake fans feel no remorse when turning the tables on you, filling your ears with negative words and weighing your soul down with unproductive, negative energy.  Thus, when you find the solution, embrace them fully, and watch the power of the fair weather fan fade.  After all, they are only powerful to the extend that you give them power.  So give them none.

This probably applies most relevantly to gifts and allowing fans to share in the success of your ventures.  In my experience, people are profoundly ungrateful.  They do not respect gifts at all, and giving someone a gift is absolutely no guarantee that they will respect you or even treat you with decency.  In fact, the the opposite seems true.  Fortunately, I learned this lesson before I ever spent even $10,000 on someone!  My first reaction, when I realized just how ineffective getting a gift for someone is, was to never get anyone a gift again.  Yet, a potential strategy to offset this would be to buy gifts for more people... just to see what would happen.  I will never buy someone anything worth that amount of money, no matter how rich I get.  

Money over everything is a mindset, and a way of life.  Money is not cavalier or flippant.  Money is 100% loyal.  If you respect money, money respects you.  

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